Who Writes the Earnest Money Check, and What Account Should It Come From?
By Joe Nelson, Retired Air Force, Nelson Home Group Team Leader and Mortgage Loan Originator
Direct answer: you fund the earnest money deposit, or someone making a documented gift on your behalf does, and it should come from the same bank account your lender has already documented. The escrow holder named in your contract deposits it and it is credited back to you at closing. Those mechanics cause more avoidable problems on first purchases than almost anything else at this stage, and none of them are about the amount.
My first-time buyer guide covers how earnest money works and when it is at risk. This post is about the mechanics of actually writing the check.
Does the earnest money check actually get cashed?
Kansas and Missouri both require brokers who hold client funds to keep them in a separate trust or escrow account.
Yes. It is not a formality and it is not held uncashed as a gesture.
The escrow holder named in your contract will deposit it. In many Kansas City transactions I handle that is a title company, but the contract can designate another lawful escrow holder, and both Kansas and Missouri allow brokerage trust accounts. It stays in escrow until it is properly disbursed.
One of my very first deals, ten years ago, my buyer wrote that check off an account they almost never used, because their regular checkbook was packed in storage during the move. The check bounced. That created a problem with title, a problem with the lender, and a level of stress on that transaction nobody needed, over a mistake that took about four seconds to make.
Write it from a live account with the money actually in it, today, not after your next paycheck lands.
What account should the earnest money come from?
My default advice is to use the account your lender already has statements for.
Underwriting has to verify the funds you are using to close. If the earnest money is being counted toward those funds, your lender may need documentation showing the deposit came from an acceptable source and cleared the account. When it comes out of an account nobody has seen, underwriting asks for statements on that account, and if those statements show deposits that themselves need explaining, you have started a paperwork chain in the middle of your loan file.
None of that is a disaster. It is just delay, arriving at the exact moment you have the least appetite for it.
Can a parent or someone else write the earnest money check?
Donor eligibility rules are set by each loan program, not by the escrow holder.
Sometimes, and this is the part to call your lender about before anybody writes anything.
Money for a home purchase generally has to come from you or from a documented gift. Gift funds are allowed on most loan programs, but they come with paperwork: a gift letter, evidence of the transfer, and rules about who qualifies as an acceptable donor. Those rules differ by loan type, and a gift that is fine on one program can create problems on another.
The failure mode is not that gifts are disallowed. It is that someone writes a check first and documents it afterward, which is the harder order to do it in. One phone call to your lender before the check gets written prevents it.
How much earnest money should you put down?
In the Kansas City resale contracts I handle, around 1% of the purchase price is common, but the amount is negotiable and the contract controls. On a $200,000 house that is roughly $2,000, and it is credited back to you at closing rather than spent.
New construction is a different conversation. In builder contracts I see, a finished spec home may stay closer to resale-style deposits, while custom selections can trigger substantially larger deposits that are frequently non-refundable. The builder contract controls. Know which one you are signing before you sign it.
At closing, that credit lands on the same statement as your prepaids and initial escrow deposit, and the escrow side of that statement is driven by Kansas City property tax rates by county.
JOE’S TAKE: Earnest money is not an extra closing fee. If the transaction closes, it is credited toward what you owe. If it does not close, what happens to it depends on the contract.
What proof will your lender need after the earnest money clears?
A check image, wire confirmation, or transfer receipt is the first page of that paper trail.
Expect to document the money path. Your lender may ask for the bank statement showing the money left your account, confirmation from the escrow holder that it was received, or both.
The cleanest file is one where the deposit traces from an account underwriting already knows about. If the money came from a gift or a different account, document it before underwriting has to reverse-engineer it. For deadlines and payment methods, I walked through what happens to your deposit after the offer is accepted.
| Stage | What keeps the file clean |
|---|---|
| Before you write it | Use an account your lender already has statements for |
| Sending the deposit | Keep the check image, wire confirmation, or transfer receipt |
| After it clears | Keep the bank activity showing the money leave your account |
| If a gift is involved | Gift letter and transfer evidence, arranged before anyone sends money |
| At closing | The deposit shows as a credit against what you owe |
When your earnest money is at risk, and what happens to it if the deal does not close, is a contract question rather than a banking question. That is covered in the first-time buyer guide, including how the In Its Present Condition Addendum changes it in Kansas City multiple-offer situations.
Frequently Asked Questions
Who holds the earnest money?
The contract tells you who holds it. In many Kansas City transactions I handle that is a title company, but state rules also allow brokerage trust accounts and other approved escrow arrangements.
Does earnest money have to come from the same account as my down payment?
No rule says it must. I prefer using an account your lender has already documented, because it usually creates the cleanest paper trail and the fewest underwriting questions.
What happens to earnest money at closing?
It is credited against the total amount you owe at closing. In the right scenario, with seller-paid closing costs, buyers occasionally get part of it back at the table instead of bringing a check.
Can gift money be used for earnest money?
Potentially. The donor and documentation rules depend on the loan program, so clear the gift with your lender before someone else sends the deposit.
Ready to Talk?
I have watched this go wrong and I have watched it go right, across hundreds of first-time buyer closings, 38 of them in the first seven months of 2026. Nelson Home Group has more than 1,200 five-star Google reviews, and I hold both a real estate license and a mortgage license.
If you want your actual numbers on an actual house, that is a conversation, not a commitment. We will run it and tell you honestly what we find.
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